Rockers & Writers
Interior. Sonic Boom
Trish: (entering) Hey Ally! Guess who got a job at Cupcake City?!
Ally: Thanks Trish, but there's no eating in the store... But I do like cupcakes, gimme that. (grabs cupcake and starts eating it)
Trish: Yeah, they give us all the rejects, that one I dropped on the floor. (Trish leaves to take call)
Ally: (throws cupcake out) Well that's what I get for breaking the rules. Hey, do you want to go to the movies Sunday?
Old Lady: Oh, I'd love to go to the movies!
Ally:, great, because you're exactly the person I was asking.
Old Lady: It's a date! (exits)
Ally: Can't wait, lady.. I never met! (Turns around to see Trish) Yeah, oh, where did you go?
Trish: I was on the phone. That was work. Apparently, being there is part of the job! (walks out) Gotta go. (Lester enters the store) Hey Mr. Dawson! (exits)
Lester: (Entering) Guess who found 37 more cents?
Ally: Dad, stop taking money out of the mall fountain. Those are people's wishes!
Lester: Well my wish came true. I have 37 more cents!
Ally: Oh, and speaking of wishes, Dad, is there any way I can put a piano upstairs in my practice room? The one I'm using is older than the lady I'm dating Sunday. (Lester looks confused at Ally) Long story.
Lester: Honey, I know you love music, but the odds of making it in the music biz are like a bazillion to one. Come here.
Ally & Lester: (Do handshake) Boom! (Lester exits, ALLY goes and reads at the counter)
Dez: (Austin and Dez enter from back of store) And action! (Austin starts playing drums with corn dogs)
Ally: (ALLY stops reading and walks over) (Ally whistles) Did you not see the 'Please do not play the drums' sign?
Austin: It's OK, I'm an awesome drummer! (Austin holds up a corn dog in each hand and continues to play drums)
Ally: (Stops Austin) Okay, what you just said has nothing to do with what I just said, are those corn dogs?
Austin: Yup. (Austin bites a corn dog and moans) Mmhm...
Ally: Ew, uh, do you know how dirty these drums are, and how unhealthy corn dogs are, and there's no food allowed in here!
Dez: I'll handle this Austin. Ma'am! We are making a music video, I am the director, although I prefer the term, filmmaker. (Dez flips his phone in the air, and drops it) And cut!
Austin: We're gonna need a lot of instruments! I can play anything, piano, drums, guitar, harp! I can even play a trumpet, through another trumpet! (Austin plays trumpet through another trumpet) (Everyone in store claps for him)
Dez: Okay, okay, well I can play a harmonica, through a sousaphone. (Dez puts a harmonica in the sousaphone, blows into sousaphone. Harmonica fly’s out into the Old Lady's mouth. Dez rushes over) Prepare to be Heimlich-ed! (Dez gives the Old Lady the Heimlich maneuver)
Austin: Here's the thing about the instruments-
Ally: You don't have any money! (Austin and Ally walk over to counter)
Austin: What if, I pay you back when I get rich and famous?
Ally: Great! Just have your butler fly over on your private jet and drop off a sack of shiny gold coins!
Austin: Really?!
Ally: No. (The old lady's false teeth fly out onto table with harmonica)
Dez: Got it! (Ally picks up the teeth and puts it in Austin's hand)
Theme Song
Interior. Ally's Practice Room
Ally: (Playing piano and singing)
♫ You don't know, know, know
My name, name, name
Gonna make, make, make you do a double take ♫
(Ally turns and sees Austin, stops singing) Ah! Uh, how long have you been standing there?
Austin: I was wondering if I could get a discount on this harmonica. Ya know, because it's been in the Old Lady?
Ally: Uh, this is my private practice room, do you not see the "Keep Out" sign?
Austin: Hey, I like that song. But if you wanna make it really catchy, you gotta speed it up!
♫ You don't know, know, know
My name, name, name
I'm gonna make, make, make 'em do a double take ♫ (Austin plays harmonica)

Cool, there's still some OLD LADY spit in here! (Austin blows the spit out on Ally)

Ally: Ew! (Ally starts to pull Austin out of her practice room) Goodbye and in the future please obey signs! (Austin plays harmonica from outside, Ally kicks the door before walking away)
Interior. Sonic Boom
Trish: (Entering) Guess who got a job at, the Magic Store?! (Trish throws a smoke bomb at a group of teens)
Ally: What about your job at Cupcake City?
Trish: Apparently being a horrible employee is grounds for termination. Isn't that shocking? (Shocks Ally) Magic shock finger. Oh, I better go, I started my five minute break two hours ago. (Starts to sing while exiting)

♫ They wanna know, know, know
Your name, name, name ♫

Ally: Wait, hey!
Trish: (Trish dances back to Ally)

♫ They want the girl, girl, girl
With the game, game, game ♫

Ally: (Ally stops Trish) Where did you hear that song?
Trish: It's all over the internet.
Ally: The internet?!
Trish: Uh, that place people go on their computer to look at stuff and shop and-
Ally: I know what the internet is!
Trish: You seriously haven't seen this video?
Ally: (Shakes head 'No')
Trish: Here, look. (Trish takes out her phone. The camera zooms in on the phone, which is showing a video of Austin singing Ally's song, Double Take)
Interior. Entertain Me Tonight
Entertain Me Tonight Host: It all started with a homemade video and a catchy song. Two million hits later, Austin Moon is a genuine overnight internet sensation. (Scene switches to the host interviewing Austin)
Austin: It wasn't exactly overnight, it was more like over two nights!
Entertain Me Tonight Host: How did you come up with your hit song?
Austin: It just came to me. (Takes the microphone from the host) What up Dez?! (Scene switches back to music video) ♫ You gotta make (make) , make (make). Make 'em do a double take,
Make 'em do a double take.♫ What up?!
Interior. Sonic Boom
Ally: That's my song, how could he just steal my song like that! He messed with the wrong girl!
Trish: That's right! Get angry! Me likey!
Ally: (Grabs Trish's phone and taps the screen) There! Allycat88 doesn't like this video! Take that Austin! Whoo! Yeah!
Trish: Calm down before you type a frowny face and really hurt his feelings! Come on, we're gonna give him a piece of your mind!
Ally: Alright, let's go! (They begin to exit)
Trish: Yeah! (Touches Ally's shoulder and accidentally shocks Ally) Sorry, magic shock finger!
Ally: We just need to find out where he lives.
Trish: Uh, the internet, you know, that place where people go on their computer to look at stuff and shop-
Ally: I know what the Internet is! (The two completely exit)
Interior. Austin's House
Dez: (Austin is running in place) Faster faster, slower... Faster, faster! (he hears someone knock on the door; he opens it to see Ally and Trish) Hey! It's Ally from the music store. (Ally and Trish enter; Dez takes Austin's sweatband off of Austin's head)
Trish: Hi, I'm Trish. Big fan. (Ally glares at Trish) Sorry.
Ally: Look, I'm here to... (Ally sees Dez making the cologne) What are you doing?
Austin: I'm making my own cologne. It's called Austin.
Dez: (Echoing what Austin said) Austin, Austin, Austin.
Austin: The secret ingredient is my sweat.
Dez: Wanna try some? (Dez sprays the "cologne" on Trish)
Trish: I don't like you.
Dez: Since Austin's famous, we figure people are gonna want some Austin merchandise.
Austin: Here's some stuff we've come up with. Austin...
Dez: (grabs a lunchbox) Lunchbox!
Austin: Austin...
Dez: (grabs a pillow) Pillow!
Austin: Austin...
Dez: (Grabs two jars and hands Austin one) Peanut butter!
Austin: Chunky...
Dez: Or smooth.
Austin & Dez: Mmhmm! (Moan and smile at each other)
Austin: And an Austin Action Figure. (He pulls the string on the figure)
Austin Action Figure: I'm awesome! I like pancakes!
Austin: It's true, I do like pancakes!
Austin & Dez: (the two do their handshake) What Up?!
Dez: And my personal fave, the Austin Foam Spitter!
Trish: Why would anyone need a foam spit-
Dez: (He sprays Trish with the foam spitter)
Trish: (She shocks Dez with her magic shock finger)
Dez: Magic shock finger. Me likey!
Ally: Look, I'm not here to see your junky Austin junk! You stole my song; you heard me playing it at the music store!
Austin: That's where the song came from? I thought I made it up! I guess that makes much more sense since I've never actually written a song before. I've tried but they're all terrible.
Ally: I wrote that song, and you have to tell everybody the truth!
Austin: I can't! Do you know how embarrassing that would be for me?!?! Consider my feelings. Are you really that selfish?
Ally: Based on that ridiculous response, I'm guessing you're not gonna do anything?
Austin: No, I wanna make this right. How about... A life-size chocolate Austin!
Dez: What up?! (He holds out wrapped chocolate in the form of Austin as Ally walks out, still irritated and aggravated)
Trish: Is that milk chocolate or dark chocolate?
Ally: (she yells off-screen) Trish!
Interior. Sonic Boom
Helen: (on the TV at Sonic Boom) Tonight on The Helen Show, overnight Internet sensation Austin Moon, live! That's right! Live, live, live!
Ally: (turns off the TV) I am so sick of that guy!
Austin Action Figure: (Trish pulls the string) I'm so talented! (Trish nods her head in agreement)
Ally: How can he steal my song like that?
Austin Action Figure: (Trish pulls string again) I'm an overnight sensation! (Trish nods head again)
Ally: Stop pulling that string.
Austin Action Figure: (Trish pulls string) I'm unstoppable! Ha ha ha... (Ally squeezes the head of the doll and drops it on the counter) Ugh.
Trish: Hey, he's gonna be on "The Helen Show" tonight, right? I say we crash his interview and tell the whole world the truth.
Ally: (feigns excitement) On live television? In front of people? (drops the phony excitement) I can't do that.
Trish: Hey, he's gonna be on "The Helen Show" tonight, right? I say we crash his interview and tell the whole world the truth.
Trish: You have to! That guy's a low-life, song-stealing thief. (her phone starts ringing; ♪they want to know know know... ♪) It's a catchy song.
Ally: That's it@ Dad, I'm taking my break. I've got to go interrupt a live television broadcast.
Lester: Okay, have fun!
Ally: Come on, Trish. We're gonna be the surprise guests on today's Helen Show. (Trish's phone rings again; ♪they want to know know know...♪) Do you want to get that?
Trish: No, it's just work. (Ally and Trish exit)
Interior. Studio 4 Entrance
Ally: Oh! (Ally pushes Trish back) Okay, the only thing standing between us and telling the world the truth about Austin is that guard. The trick is to act like you're supposed to be here. (Walks to the guard) You gotta exude confidence.
Security Guard: Can I help you ladies?
Ally: No! (She walks back) Yes, we're looking for the kitchen. Or bathroom! We're friends with Bernie. Or Lulu?
Trish: (takes over) We're going to The Helen Show. We're musicians in Austin Moon's band.
Security Guard: Look, you Austies have been trying to sneak through here all day. He's dreamy, that song's catchy, I get it! Sorry, ladies. If your name's not on my list, you're not getting in.
Trish: Did we say musicians? No, see, I meant, magicians! (Trish throws a smoke bomb; she and Ally run away)
Security Guard: Bad liars... Pretty good magicians. (Sits down)
Interior. Studio 4
Helen: (On TV) Hey, welcome back! Our next guest is overnight internet sensation, Austin Moon! (He waves to the audience)
Trish: It's go time.
Ally: I can't do this. There's a stage out there; you know I have stage fright.
Trish: I know it's scary, but you can do it! I'm here for you. You just take all the time you need.
Ally: Thanks Trish, I really appreciate-
Trish: Time's up! (She pushes Ally into a studio)
Interior. News Studio
Ally: Hold everything! We're here to tell you the truth! And not like a cute weasel you want as a pet; more of a lying, evil weasel who steals music! (Ally turns to Trish while the camera crew moves the cameras) Here's never even written a song before, because he can't! (Ally turns back at the camera crew) And... this isn't The Helen Show.
Male Newscaster: (he acts like he has just heard important news) This just in: The Helen Show tapes next door! (Security guard enters to take Trish and Ally out of the studio)
Interior. The Helen Show
Austin: (He performs Double Take on the show) ♫They want to know, know, know. Your name, name, name. They want the girl, girl, girl. With game, game, game. And when they look, look, look. Your way, way, way. You gotta make (make) , make (make). Make 'em do a double take. Make 'em do a double take.♫
Helen: So we are out of time.
Austin: Oh.
Helen: It's too bad 'cause we would love to hear you do another original song.
Austin: Darn! I've written so many songs. (He turns around and feigns a look of disappointment) I wish you had more time.
Helen: How about you come back tomorrow?
Austin: (panicking) Tomorrow?
Helen: Yeah.
Austin: Another original song?
Helen: Uh-huh.
Austin: By tomorrow?
Helen: That's what I said.
Austin: Um, ym, I...
Helen: Oh, come on. (She stands up) You don't want to let down all your fans. Right, Austies? Yeah.
Austin: Um, okay. Tomorrow it is.
Helen: Oh, you heard it right here, folks! Austin will be back tomorrow to do a new original song! Yes!
Interior. Sonic Boom
Trish: Guess who got a job at the pet store? (imitating a dog and then a cat) Roof roof meow!
Ally: You didn't even work at the magic shop two days. That's gotta be a new record!
Trish: I plan on being better at this job...after this. Has anyone seen a giant snake about yey big? (shoppers in the store start freaking out) Oh, he's probably not poisonous. (the shoppers relax) But there's a really good chance that he's totally poisonous.
Austin: (he and Dez enter the store) Ally, I need your help.
Ally: Speaking of giant snakes. (walks away from the counter)
Austin: I need a new song by tomorrow!
Ally: Ha! Why don't you just write a song?
Austin: You know I can't. I've tried. (he grabs a guitar) Listen. (he sings Song Song)
Dez: I wrote that last part. (He tries to get Trish to high-five him, but he fails)
Ally: Okay, uh, how about this? ♪ I'm not helping you with your song, get out of my store! ♪
Dez: That doesn't rhyme.
Ally: (she points at the door) ♪ There's the door! ♪
Dez: That's better.
Austin: I know you're mad. I didn't mean to steal your song. Then I acted like a weasel. Not a cute cuddly weasel, but a jerky, no-credit-giving weasel. I'm sorry. Who am I kidding? My dad always said music was a waste of time. He said I had a bazillion to one chance of making it.
Ally: That's exactly what my dad said to me.
Dez: Do you know what my dad said to me? (quoting his dad) Dez, stop texting the dog!
Austin: I guess my 15 minutes of fame are over. I just wanted to prove my dad wrong. (he starts to exit)
Ally: Austin, wait! I'll help you write one more song.
Austin: You will? Yes! Whoa! Thank you, thank you!
Ally: But first you have to do something for me!
Austin: Anything. Name it.
Ally: Uh, yh, I want a... a... (tries to make a decision) I... I want a... a ham!
Austin: Did you just say a ham?
Ally: Apparently I did.
Dez: (he takes a ham out of his backpack) Here, you can give her my ham if you want.
Interior. Ally's Practice Room
Austin: Okay, we have 18 hours to write the greatest song ever. Go!
Ally: It's not that easy.
Austin: I'll get you started. (he plays a note on the piano) There. That's the first note. That helps, right?
Ally: (using sarcasm) Gee, are you sure you've never written a song before?
Austin: What do you normally do?
Ally: Well, there isn't a "normally." Sometimes, I get a tune in my head. Sometimes I think of a lyric and write it down. (she looks at her songbook; Austin wants to take the songbook but Ally stops him) Never touch my book.
Austin: (He touches the songbook but Ally turns him down) What do you got?
Ally: (reading from her songbook) ♫The tears of your heart cry...♫
Austin: Too depressing.
Ally: Okay. (Ally flips through the book for another lyric) ♫The midnight sadness...♫
Austin: That's even more too depressing. This song should be fun, like a splash of sunshine. You're like a drizzle of darkness. We need to get you to relax. You know, get your creative juices flowing. Shut your eyes.
Ally: I'm not going to shut-
Austin: Just shut your eyes.
Ally: (she closes her eyes) Okay, I will. (Austin tries to touch her book) Don't touch my book.
Austin: Okay, imagine you come home... and your living room is full of cheerleaders.
Ally: Uh, that's not really my idea of fun.
Austin: Okay, pretend you're on stage performing...
Ally: Oh, no way, I have horrible stage fright.
Austin: Then imagine you're on the beach!
Ally: Ugh, sand is getting everywhere... Ew, is that guy really wearing a thong?
Austin: Okay! Forget the beach; what do you like?
Ally: (she smiles and turns) I like pickles!
Austin: Great! Pretend you're eating a pickle!
Ally: There's no eating in the store.
Austin: Alright! Why don't we try this; I'll close my eyes, and you tell me to imagine stuff. (he sits on the piano bench and closes his eyes)
Ally: Uh, okay, imagine I'm giving up, I quit!
Austin: Got it! (he smiles) Are there cheerleaders there?
Ally: Austin! What I'm saying is maybe we should just forget this whole song writing thing. (she stands up)
Austin: Whoa, whoa! (pulls her shoulder and sits her back on the bench) Not so fast.
Interior. Sonic Boom
Austin: Okay.
Ally: Um, what are you doing?
Austin: Funning you up. Oh yeah! (he starts dancing)
Ally: Uh, no! (she starts walking away)
Austin: (he grabs her hand and pulls her back) Come on, dance!
Ally: No, I'm okay! This is silly! (Austin blows a whistle; Trish and Dez walk out of the practice room and dance for a while; Ally smiles and claps) Okay!
Austin: Come on!
Ally: (Austin, Trish and Dez all tell Ally to dance; she agrees and starts dancing) Wee! Whoo! There, I'm dancing!
Austin: Are you sure?
Trish: That was like the worst dancing! (Dez, Trish, and Austin all moan at Ally)
Ally: Okay, fine! (she dances again; the other three join in) I think it worked; I feel like I can do anything! Watch, I'm gonna do a cartwheel! (gets into the position; she then reclines) I can't do a cartwheel.
Austin: Well, don't waste the creativity! Come on! (he and Ally sit by the piano)
Ally: Let's write a song! (they both start playing the piano)
A montage is shown. The first scene is of Austin & Ally playing the piano. The next scene shows her writing in her book on the counter as Austin plays on the piano; he writes the tunes down and then looks negatively; he crumples the paper up and throws it away. The next scene is of Ally working at the piano until Austin plays an attention-catching instrument. She still works at the piano while Austin now sits at a stool and plays the guitar; they share a smile. Later on, Austin falls asleep on the counter; Ally pops up and bashes two hand cymbals together; Austin is shocked as he wakes up and falls off of the counter. Next, Ally is asleep on the piano; Austin uses Trish's magic shock finger to wake her up. She starts sitting on the counter and writes in her bok; Austin turns as throws another crumpled paper at Ally. It does not reach her; he turns back around and falls off of the piano bench onto the floor. Later, they work at the piano and Ally smiles at Austin as he plays the guitar. Their hands touch as they play the piano later on. Finally, it is morning and they have finished the song.
Ally & Austin: ♫Break down the walls♫
Austin: It only took all night, but we did it! (he and Ally stand up)
Ally: Whooo!
Austin: This song is awesome! (they high-five each other)
Ally': Yeah, well, you better hurry; you only have one hour to get to The Helen Show. (she starts pushing Austin to the entrance of Sonic Boom)
Austin: You mean we better hurry; I want you to be there with me.
Ally: (she smiles) Really? You mean it?
Austin: (he smiles too) I wouldn't be going to The Helen Show at all if it wasn't for you... Thank you. (they both try to hug and high-five at conflicting times; they give up as Trish and Dez enter)
Austin: We did it!
Trish: Ah, we knew you could do it! Here, we got you this. Guess who got a job at the mug store? (she holds out a mug and hands it to Ally)
Ally: (quoting the words on the mug) Aw, congrats, we knew you could do it. (ends quote) Aw, thanks!
Dez: (he smiles) We also got you this one. (gives Ally another mug)
Ally: (reading the mug) Sorry you failed. You did your best?
Trish: No, we got you two mugs just in case. (she turns to face Dez) Dez wasn't supposed to show you that one. (Dez turns as he finally understands)
Austin: Come on, we gotta go! (they all start moving)
Ally: Let's go!
Interior. The Helen Show
Helen: Ok, up next we have Austin Moon with his new song (the crowd cheers)
Ally: (Happy) Millions of peple are about to hear my song!
Trish: (Excited) It was so worth quitting my job at the mug store for this!
Austin: (Rushes up to Ally) Ally the piano player is sick! You have to play piano for me!
Ally: Uh uh I cant go on there, you know I have stage fright!
Dez: What if they turn off the cameras and the audience goes like this (Puts hands on eyes)
Ally: NO! No, I'm sorry, I cant do this!
Dez: No it's really easy just go left and then right, left and then right (Does the sequence again with his hands)
Austin: Look it's like you said in the song, Take a chance, break down the walls.
Ally: (Hesitates) I'm sorry. (starts to walk off)
Austin: Wait! (Ally turns around) I have the perfect solution!
New Scene
Set Worker: Okay, we're live in 30 seconds
Austin: (Looks behind the curtain) See Ally nobody can see you. It's just like your not on stage!
Ally: (Worried) I'm trying really hard not to freak out here!
Austin: Your going to be great, trust me. (Winks at Ally then goes) (Ally smiles a little in return)
Helen Show Resumes
Helen: (dancing) Hey, and welcome back, here to sing his brand new original song is AUSTIN MOON! (Ally starts to play the piano)
Austin: (Speaking into microphone) Thank you. This song was written by an incredible song writer Ally Dawson. (scene changes to show Ally smiling before we see Austin again)
Austin: She kinda wrote my first song too...Ladies and gentlemen.....HERE SHE IS! (Austin points with his hand as the curtains draw back, showing a shocked Ally as she played a different last note) See! You're facing your fear, that was my plan. Your welcome!
Ally suddenly panics as she slides off the piano bench and onto the floor as she crawls away from the spotlight, But it follows her, she then crawls away but into the drums, as a drum gets caught on her head she stands up, grabbing onto the curtains but pulling them down, and she tumbles into a stand for the set. Like dominos, they knock over each other, as she eventually ruins the whole Helen Show set. Ally takes the drum off of her head and sees what she had caused.
Austin: Uh, let's hear it for Ally everybody..? (the sign for the show falls; Ally is embarrassed enough to put the drum back on her head as she crawls away)
Interior. Sonic Boom
Trish: How was your date with the old lady?
Ally: She slept through the whole movie and I had to explain the whole thing to her on the bus ride home. (they both nod together as Ally opens the practice room door and enters) My practice room! o- What is all this stuff, what are you guys doing here, PICKLES! (Ally walks to the pickles and then to a new piano) But look at that piano!
Austin: I used all my money I got from being on The Helen Show to pay for all this.
Ally: I-I can't believe you did this, thank you! 
Austin: I figured we'd be spending a lot of time in here so we should probably make it as comfortable as possible.
Ally: Um, We?!
Austin: (Smiles) I want you to be my partner.
Ally: Spend more time with you?
Austin: You're a songwriter with stage fright; I'm a singer who loves being on stage. We're a perfect match! What do you say?
Ally: (Thinks, smiles, then nods) We're partners. (they both attempt to high-five and hug at opposing times; they give up once more)
Trish: (Walks up to Austin & Ally) Guess who got a job as Austin's Manager ?!
Austin: She has so much work experience, her resume was about eight pages!!
Trish: Oh, I promised the fans you'd put up the songs on the website every Friday. Oh and also I don't work Fridays or any other week day. (walks off)
Ally: Wait we have to write a new song every week?
Dez: (Jogs up to Trish) Trish for the first video we need ten thousand monkeys and a big wedding cake!
Trish: You can have a turtle and a doughnut.
Dez: (Turns to a box and pulls out a doughnut on a turtle's neck) But I already have that!
Austin: (Reading phone) Aw man my video just got put to number two!
Ally: (Smiles) What's number one?
Austin: (Walks up to Ally smiling) You on the Helen Show! Hey look they're even showing the part where you threw up on Helen! You're famous! Thanks to me!
Ally: (Smiling) Thanks to you, well, lemme show ya something (puts arm around Austin and takes him in front of the Foam Spitter) Okay. (Foam squirts onto Austin as he starts to defend himself)
Dez: (runs up to Austin) Oh me too, me too! (Gets foamed)
(End credits, end of episode)
Transcripts Next:
Kangaroos & Chaos/Transcript

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